Ma Funeral Pyre.

Ma Funeral Pyre.(wha's nae invited)

Auld fowk, their jist there fir the heat, get cornbeef legs, then bugger aff tae Benidorm
using their winter heating allowance.

Professional mourners, they go tae iverybodies funeral, y've maybe nodded tae them ance
or twice, in the passin, but they tell abody, yi were the bestest o frends.They're only
there fir the freebies, on yir bike.

Former work mates an colleagues, their only ther tae gloat.

Onybody wi mair than wan face.

Holy Joes, nae offence, but it's no ma cup o tea.

Onybody a owe money tae.


Ma Funeral Pyre (wha's invited)

Ray Mears (survival expert) if onybody can licht a fire it's him.

A bloke wi a box o matches an a jerrycan o petrol, for backup," Sorry Ray."

A metreoligist, so the fire can be started, when the wind is in the right direction,
so it blaws into someones washin.

Ony o ma family an friends that are still no affended by me.

Onyone that's walking The Red Road.

Ony one that's gein a donation tae "Maggies"

And ony dug or cat, that's passin by, an want tae warm their paws, this ane's on me.


Bruce Dick.